Personal Growth

  • Burning It All Down: My Leap Towards Happiness

    Burning It All Down: My Leap Towards Happiness

    If you’re in your mid-30s or early 40s and feeling like a hamster on a wheel, just going through the motions day after day, you’re not alone. I was there, too. Then I said, “Screw it!” and decided to start over from scratch. Sounds batshit crazy, right? But let me tell you, it was the best damn decision I ever made. Here’s my story.

    The Decision to Start Over

    After years of hustling in the online business world, I decided to burn it all down and start fresh. Why the hell would I end something that was thriving and making money? Something that I once loved more than free Wi-Fi? Well, buckle up because I’m about to spill the tea.

    In April 2022, I officially quit everything. I walked away from my online business and started over from scratch. And guess what? I don’t regret it for a second.

     

    The Reason Behind the Madness

    I Wasn’t Fucking Happy Anymore

    Everything felt like a rerun of a bad sitcom. I was mentally in the dumps, gained 15 lbs, dreaded motherhood, and hated my business. The irony? I taught mindfulness and self-love for years. But when money and business lost their charm, I had to find a new driving force. And that force was ME.

    So, I Chose Myself

    When you put yourself first, everything else falls into place. I’m no longer defined by the external world dictating my fulfillment. And let me tell you, I’ve never been so damn happy. My life is incredibly different now—it’s like I walked into a parallel universe. Every relationship I have improved because when you’re happy with yourself, you’re happier with those around you.

    The Benefits of Starting Over

    According to a study by Shopify, seasoned entrepreneurs know that failure comes with the territory. They are often the ones who try, fail, and all start over again. Entrepreneur mindset kicks in and transforms failure into opportunity. One study found that second-time entrepreneurs had higher success rates than entrepreneurship newbies.

    Starting over allows you to be braver, smarter, and more efficient. It increases the stakes for us, making us more committed and driven. It also opens doors to a new way of thinking and being by changing (and hopefully lightening) your load and offering new perspectives.

    My Business Has Now Evolved

    My business has now evolved into Daring to be Human, a public charity that unleashes the power of selling goods and services to fund our mission. I aim to open a healing retreat center in Puerto Rico, offering alternative therapies and fostering local sustainability. This would help empower local farmers who cannot purchase land due to economic challenges while increasing food production in the area.

    8 Things to consider if you are thinking about starting over in your business or career to know you are making the right decision based on logic and reason rather than a rash reaction.

    1. Assess your current situation: Roll up your sleeves and take a long, hard look at your current job or business. Understand why you want to make a change and what you want to achieve by doing so. 
    2. Consider the pros and cons: Make a list of the pros and cons of staying in your current situation and making a change. Think about each option’s potential risks and rewards, and decide which is best for you. 
    3. Set realistic goals: Before you embark on your new venture, set goals for yourself that are achievable and measurable. Then plan out the steps you need to take to reach those goals. 
    4. Research your new path: Do your homework and research the industry, the job market, and the demands of the new path you are considering. Make sure that it is the right move for you. 
    5. Ask for advice: Talk to experts in the field, family, and friends who have ventured down a similar path. Listen to their advice and heed it where necessary. 
    6. Make a plan: Make a detailed plan that outlines the steps you need to take for your new venture. Be sure to set time frames for each step and have a plan for when things don’t go as expected. 
    7. Take action: Put your plan into action, and don’t be afraid to make adjustments along the way. Be prepared to take risks and accept that there may be failures along the way. 
    8. Evaluate your progress: Once you’ve taken the plunge, evaluate your progress and make adjustments as necessary. Celebrate your successes, and don’t be afraid to take a step back if needed.

    If you’re unhappy with your current situation, don’t be scared to make a drastic change—you might find happiness again as I did. Life is too short to settle for anything less than happiness and contentment. Trust me; it’s possible to find your joy again—I’m living proof.

    Your Turn

    Now, it’s your turn. Are you feeling stuck in your current situation? Are you considering a bold move to start over? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Drop a comment below and let’s start a conversation.

    Starting over isn’t easy, but sometimes it’s the best thing you can do for yourself. It takes courage, determination, and a whole lot of self-love. But trust me, the rewards are worth it. So, if you’re feeling stuck, why not consider a fresh start? You never know where it might lead you.

    Disclaimer: I was in the financial place to do so. Not having a plan at the time this took place was a viable option for me as it wouldn’t burden my family drastically. So, don’t just jump without checking if you have a parachute.

    If you enjoyed this post and found it helpful, please share it with others who might benefit from it. And don’t forget to subscribe to my YouTube Channel for more inspiring stories and practical tips on starting over and living a life of fulfillment and joy.

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  • Shadow Work: Your No-Nonsense Way to Inner Healing

    Shadow Work: Your No-Nonsense Way to Inner Healing

    Today, we’re diving headfirst into shadow work’s deep, dark, and somewhat mysterious world. You might be thinking, “What the hell is shadow work?” Well, buckle up, buttercup, because we’re about to get real uncomfortable, real fast. But trust me; it’s worth it.

    What the Hell is Shadow Work?

    Shadow work is like that awkward family reunion where you must confront your weird Uncle Bob, who always makes inappropriate jokes. In this case, Uncle Bob is the part of you that you’ve been avoiding like the plague. It’s not some spooky, dark magic shit, but a journey inward, through the uncomfortable truths and shadows, to get beyond your suffering.

    The Ugly Truth About Shadows

    Most people are walking around like they’re in a damn episode of The Walking Dead, living in denial of their shadows. This causes a shitload of suffering because, let’s face it, you can’t ignore your problems and be at peace simultaneously. That’s like trying to enjoy a peaceful picnic while a bear is rummaging through your food. Not gonna happen.

    The Science Behind Shadow Work

    According to Carl Jung, a renowned Swiss psychiatrist, the ‘shadow’ is the unknown dark side of our personality. It comprises repressed ideas, instincts, impulses, weaknesses, desires, and embarrassing fears. This is the stuff we deny in ourselves and project onto others.

    The Benefits of Shadow Work

    There are a shit ton of benefits to doing shadow work. The most obvious is that it can help free you from the pain and suffering these shadows are causing you. You can move through and release them from your system by facing them head-on.

    Additionally, shadow work can help you to become more self-aware and emotionally intelligent. As you learn more about yourself and your shadows, you’ll be better equipped to deal with life’s curveballs healthily.

    Finally, shadow work can also lead to personal transformation and growth. You’ll find that you can live more fully and authentically as you heal your shadows. You may even find that your life takes on new meaning and purpose.

    Shadow Work in Action: A Real-Life Example

    Let’s take a look at a real-life example. Meet Lisa Coots-Schooley. Lisa, despite her success, had been on a journey to find her purpose. She had tried everything, spending about 75K (USD) on rehab, therapy, courses, retreats, and programs. But nothing seemed to work until she found shadow work.

    Lisa says, “She [Danielle] got into my core and tore down those walls; no one has ever done that. Everything else I did only uncovered surface layers – she went so deep she brought a voice to parts of me – it’s what I prayed for.”

    Through shadow work, Lisa could confront her inner demons and tear down the walls holding her back. She could go deeper than she ever had before, bringing a voice to parts of herself that had been silenced. This transformative experience allowed Lisa to find her purpose and live a more fulfilling life.

    This is the power of shadow work. It’s not just about confronting your shadows; it’s about understanding them, integrating them, and using them to fuel your growth and transformation. It’s about finding and using your voice to express your true self. And as Lisa’s story shows, it’s a journey that’s well worth the effort.

    How to Do Shadow Work

    If you’re ready to do some shadow work, there are a few things you can do to get started. First, getting rid of anything in your life that’s not serving you is important—this includes toxic relationships, negative thought patterns, unhelpful belief systems, etc. These things will only weigh you down and make it harder for you to do shadow work.

    Second, start paying attention to your dreams and intuitions. These are messages from your subconscious mind trying to tell you something important. Pay attention to what these messages tell you and see if there’s anything YOU need to work on—not anyone else, just YOU!

    Lastly, find a therapist or counselor who can help guide you through this process if needed, someone who won’t judge or shame you but will help hold space for YOU while YOU confront YOUR shadows head-on.

    Ready to Kick Some Shadow Ass?

    So, if you’re interested in doing some shadow work, plenty of resources are available online and in books. I recommend starting with journaling prompts or exercises to familiarize yourself with your shadows. Once you feel ready, consider working with a therapist or coach specializing in shadow work. Remember, there’s no rush – take things at your own pace and go at whatever speed feels comfortable for you. Trust that the process of shadow work will unfold in perfect timing for you.

    I specialize in shadow work with my private clients; my practice goes much deeper than traditional shadow work due to my spiritual gifts and intuitive abilities. Let’s chat to see if I may be able to assist you https://danielleaime.com/free-curiosity-call/

    This guide has actionable insights and reflective exercises to help you dive into authentic living. 

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  • The Damn Good Side of Not Being a Damn Perfect

    Uncovering the True Rewards of Not Being Perfect

    Life ain’t a damn fairy tale, and you sure as hell ain’t Cinderella. So, let’s cut the crap and get real. You’re not perfect, and guess what? That’s the best fucking thing about you!

    The Real Deal About Perfection

    Ever heard the saying, “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters”? Well, it’s not just some fancy quote to slap on your Instagram bio. It’s the real deal. We all fuck up. It’s part of the human package. But it’s how we bounce back from those fuck-ups that define us.

    We’ve got this twisted idea that perfection is the goal. But let me tell you, that’s a load of bull. Perfection is a myth, a mirage. It’s like chasing a rainbow, thinking there’s a pot of gold at the end. Spoiler alert: there isn’t!

    Why Imperfection Kicks Perfectionism’s Ass

    Striving for perfection is like running on a treadmill. You’re huffing and puffing, but you’re not going anywhere. And at the end of the day, you’re just left feeling like shit. So, why not embrace your glorious imperfections? They’re what make you unique, interesting, and human.

    The Story of John: A Tale of Perfectionism

    Take John, for example. He was a high-flying executive, always striving for perfection. He worked 80-hour weeks, never took vacations, and was constantly stressed out. He thought he was chasing success, but he only got a heart attack at 40. Don’t be like John.

    Stop Trying to Be a Damn Superhero

    You’re not Superman or Wonder Woman. You’re you, and that’s your superpower. So, stop trying to do it all and start doing what you can, and do it damn well.

    Common Mistakes and How to Avoid Them

    Mistake #1: Playing the Lone Ranger

    We all need a helping hand sometimes. So, swallow your pride and ask for help when you need it. It doesn’t make you weak; it makes you smart.

    Mistake #2: Letting Your Emotions Drive the Bus

    We’re all emotional creatures. But if you let your emotions take the wheel all the time, you’re in for a bumpy ride. Learn to control your emotions, not the other way around.

    Mistake #3: Not Planning for Shit

    Life is unpredictable. If you don’t plan for the future, you’re setting yourself up for a world of hurt. So, get your shit together and start planning.

    How to Kick Perfectionism to the Curb

    1. Stop comparing your behind-the-scenes to everyone else’s highlight reel.
    2. Don’t sweat the small stuff. It’s just that – small stuff.
    3. Let go of the idea of perfection. It’s overrated.
    4. Focus on the journey, not the destination.
    5. Take it one day at a time. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither are you.

    Mistakes: The Best Damn Teachers

    Mistakes are life’s way of teaching us. They help us grow, learn, and become better versions of ourselves. So, the next time you fuck up, don’t beat yourself up. Instead, ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” Then pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep moving forward.

    Exercise: Turning Fuck-ups into Opportunities

    The next time you make a mistake, write it down. Then, write down what you learned from it and how you can apply that lesson in the future. This simple exercise can help you turn your fuck-ups into opportunities for growth.

    The Power of Self-Compassion

    When you make a mistake, it’s easy to fall into the trap of self-criticism. But research shows that self-compassion – treating yourself with kindness and understanding when you screw up – is linked to less anxiety and depression. So, the next time you mess up, instead of beating yourself up, try treating yourself with the same kindness you’d show to a friend who’s struggling.

    Exercise: Practice Self-Compassion

    Next time you make a mistake, take a moment to acknowledge your feelings. Say to yourself, “This is really difficult right now,” or, “I’m feeling really stressed.” Then, remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes and you’re not alone. Finally, ask yourself, “What do I need to hear right now to express kindness to myself?” This simple exercise can help you cultivate a more compassionate attitude towards yourself.

     

    So, here’s the deal. You’re not perfect, and that’s okay. The world doesn’t revolve around you. Other people have valid opinions, too. You’re not always going to be the smartest person in the room. Life is full of surprises. Embrace them!

    Remember, you’re not a robot. You’re a beautifully flawed human being. So, the next time you make a mistake, cut yourself some slack. Learn from it, grow from it, and move the fuck on.

    And remember, as we’ve discussed in our previous blog post, change is the only constant. So, embrace the change, embrace your imperfections, and keep growing.

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  • Toxic Positivity: The Dark Side of Being Too Sunny

    Toxic Positivity: The Dark Side of Being Too Sunny

    Alright, let’s dive into this, shall we? We’re talking about this sneaky little bugger called “toxic positivity.” Yeah, you heard it right. It’s not all rainbows and unicorns regarding positivity, folks. Sometimes, it can be as toxic as that ex you should’ve dumped ages ago.

    What the Hell is Toxic Positivity?

    So, what’s this toxic positivity crap all about? Well, it’s when you’re forcing yourself to be all sunshine and daisies, even when life’s throwing you curveballs. It’s like trying to convince yourself that everything’s peachy when it’s clearly going to hell in a handbasket. It’s not just unhealthy, it’s downright dangerous. We’re humans, not robots. We’re meant to feel all the feels, not just the good ones.

    Let’s take an example. Imagine you’re having a really shitty day. You lost your job, car broke down, and dog ran away. But instead of acknowledging your feelings, you plaster a smile and tell yourself, “Everything’s fine!” That’s toxic positivity in action. It’s like convincing yourself that the house isn’t on fire when standing in the flames.

    The Ugly Side of Toxic Positivity

    Now, I’m not saying positivity is bad. Hell no! But there’s a difference between being positive and being delusional. Life isn’t always a bed of roses, and it’s okay to admit it. You don’t have to be the Energizer Bunny all the time. It’s okay to feel down, angry, or frustrated. It’s part of being human.

    So, how does this toxic positivity show up? Well, ever been in a situation where you’re feeling like crap, but everyone around you is like, “Cheer up, buttercup!” or “Look on the bright side!”? That’s toxic positivity right there. It’s like telling someone who’s drowning to just swim. Not helpful, right?

    And here’s the kicker: toxic positivity can mess with your mental health. When you’re constantly trying to suppress your feelings, it can lead to anxiety, depression, and a whole lot of other issues you don’t want to deal with. It’s like trying to hold a beach ball underwater. It’s not only exhausting, but it’s also just a matter of time before it pops back up. And guess what? This isn’t just me talking out of my ass. There’s a real connection between toxic positivity and mental health issues like depression and suicide, especially among men. Don’t believe me? Check out this article.

    The Antidote to Toxic Positivity

    So, what can we do instead? Well, for starters, let’s ditch the “just stay positive” BS. Instead, let’s try to be more mindful of our language. When someone’s going through a tough time, let’s listen and validate their feelings. Let’s acknowledge that life can be a rollercoaster, and it’s okay to not enjoy the ride sometimes.

    And remember, it’s okay to feel your feelings. You don’t have to put on a brave face all the time. It’s okay to admit when you’re not okay. It’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to be human. And if you want to learn more about the power of emotions, check out this article.

    Exercise: Embracing Your Emotions

    Here’s a little exercise for you. The next time you’re feeling down, instead of trying to force a smile, try this:

    1. Acknowledge your feelings. Say to yourself, “I’m feeling sad/angry/frustrated, and that’s okay.”

    2. Allow yourself to feel. Don’t try to suppress your emotions. Let them flow through you.

    3. Express your feelings. Write in a journal, talk to a friend, or even shout into a pillow. Do whatever helps you express your emotions.

    4. Practice self-compassion. Be kind to yourself. Remember, it’s okay to not be okay.

    Avoiding the Trap of Toxic Positivity

    So, how do we avoid falling into the toxic positivity trap? Well, it starts with acknowledging that life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. It’s okay to feel sad, angry, or frustrated. It’s okay to have bad days. And it’s okay to talk about it.

    Let’s stop pretending that everything’s perfect when it’s not. Let’s stop invalidating our feelings in the name of positivity. Let’s start being real with ourselves and with each other. Because at the end of the day, we’re all just humans trying to navigate this crazy thing called life.

    So, the next time someone tells you to “just stay positive,” remember this: It’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay to feel your feelings. And it’s okay to be human. Because being human isn’t about being happy all the time. It’s about being real, being authentic, and being you.

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  • 5 No-Bullshit Tips to Unearth Your Purpose as a High Achiever

    5 No-Bullshit Tips to Unearth Your Purpose as a High Achiever

    You’ve got the fancy job, the swanky house, and a social circle that would make anyone green with envy. But let’s cut the crap – are you feeling a bit hollow inside? Like you’re missing something? That’s because you’re chasing the wrong rabbit, my friend. You’re so busy collecting trophies for your external achievements that you’ve forgotten to look inside and ask, “What the hell makes me happy?”

    1. You’re More Than Your Damn Achievements

    First things first, stop defining yourself by your external achievements. You’re not your job title or your bank balance. You’re not the car you drive or the size of your house. You’re a human being, not a human doing. So, take a step back, look inside, and ask yourself, “What truly matters to me?”

    The Story of John

    Let’s take John, for example. He was a high-flying executive, earning six figures and living in a penthouse. But he was miserable. He realized he was living a life defined by others’ expectations, not his own. So, he took a step back, reassessed his life, and found his true passion – teaching. He quit his job, became a teacher, and has never been happier.

    2. Dig Deep and Find Your Happy Place

    Next, it’s time to do some soul-searching. It sounds like some hippie-dippie bullshit, but trust me, it’s worth it. Think about what lights you up, what makes you feel alive. Is it painting? Dancing? Helping others? Whatever it is, do more of it. Life’s too short to do shit you hate.

    Exercise: Journaling Your Thoughts

    Start by journaling your thoughts, feelings, and dreams. Write down what you love, what you hate, what you’re passionate about. This is your life we’re talking about, so don’t hold back. You might just find some gold nuggets in there. For more on this, check out our guide on finding your purpose.

     

    3. Prioritize Joy, Not Just Your To-Do List

    Once you’ve figured out what brings you joy, make it a priority. I’m not saying quit your job and join the circus (unless that’s your thing), but find ways to incorporate what you love into your everyday life. Remember, dreams remain dreams until you turn them into reality. So, stop daydreaming and start doing.

    The Power of Alignment

    When you align your life with your purpose, magic happens. You feel happier, more fulfilled, and more at peace with yourself. Don’t believe me? A study by Pew Research Center found that people who find meaning in their job or career are typically happier. So, align your life with your purpose and watch your happiness levels soar. For more on this, check out our guide on alignment with your purpose.

    4. Follow Your Heart, Not Just Your Head

    When finding your purpose, your heart often knows the way. So, if something is pulling you, don’t ignore it. Listen to your heart. It might lead you to some unexpected places, but that’s where the magic happens.

    The Story of Sarah

    Take Sarah, for example. She was a successful lawyer, but she always felt a pull towards art. She ignored it for years, thinking it was impractical. But the pull never went away. Finally, she decided to listen to her heart. She quit her job, returned to school, and is now a successful artist. She followed her heart, and it led her to her purpose.

    5. Ask for Help; you’re Not Superman

    Don’t be a hero if you’re struggling to find your purpose. Ask for help. Reach out to a therapist, a coach, or a mentor. There’s no shame in it. It’s a sign of strength. It shows you’re brave enough to face your fears and committed to achieving your goals.

    The Power of Asking for Help

    Asking for help can be a game-changer. It can give you a fresh perspective, new ideas, and valuable insights. So, don’t be afraid to ask for help. You’re not alone in this journey.

     

    Remember, your purpose in life isn’t about what you do. It’s about you, how you feel about yourself, where you are, and how you feel. It’s about aligning your life with your purpose, which will evolve as you grow and change. So, stay open to new possibilities, take risks, and follow your dreams, no matter how unconventional they may seem. Keep learning, keep growing, and keep striving to be the best version of yourself. After all, you’re a high achiever, and that’s what high achievers do.

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  • How the Hell Intentions Can Help You Manifest Your Damn Goals

    How the Hell Intentions Can Help You Manifest Your Damn Goals

    Ever had one of those kickass days where everything just falls into place? You know, the kind where you nail that big presentation or finally kick that monster project to the curb? Yeah, we’ve all had ’em. But what if I told you, you could have more of those days? Not just once in a blue moon, but every goddamn day? That sounds like a tall order, right? But it ain’t impossible. The secret sauce? Set your intentions for each day, and let the Universe handle the rest.

    What the Hell is an Intention?

    An intention is a mental state about committing to doing something in the future. It’s like making a promise to yourself to get off your ass and take action. Setting intentions is like having a superpower for creating change in your life. But don’t just take my word for it. Dive into the damn power of your mindset and steer your life toward success.

    How to Set Intentions Like a Pro

    Now, you might wonder, how do I set intentions? Here’s the lowdown:

    1. Make sure your intentions are clear and concise. No beating around the bush.
    2. Keep it real. Your intentions should be achievable, not some pie-in-the-sky bullshit.
    3. Keep it positive. Your intentions should be helpful, not harmful.
    4. Challenge yourself, but don’t set yourself up for failure.
    5. Make sure your intentions light a fire under your ass and inspire others to take action.

    Goals vs. Intentions: What’s the Difference?

    Goals are the endgame, the desired outcome. Intentions, however, are the steps you take to reach that goal. They’re the specific actions you’ll take to turn your dreams into reality. Both are important, but if you want to hit your goals, you’ve gotta be crystal clear about your intentions.

    For instance, if your goal is to land a new client, your intention might be, “I’m confident and ready to knock the socks off potential clients with my proposal.” If your goal is to get a promotion, your intention might be, “I can’t wait to show my boss how much I’ve kicked ass, and I know my value to the company.” See how those intentions feel more empowering than just hoping for the best?

    Visualization: Your Secret Weapon

    So, how can you use visualization to help manifest your goals? First, get clear on what you want. Picture it in your mind and feel you’ve already achieved it. Focus on the positive emotions you’d experience if your goal were a reality. And remember, patience is a virtue. Visualization isn’t a magic wand, but with consistency, you’ll start to see results.

    Other Techniques to Manifest Your Goals

    Well, visualization is a biggie, but there’s more to it. Affirmations can help program your mind for success. Repeat positive statements about yourself and your ability to achieve your goals. And of course, take action. The more you do to move towards your goals, the more likely you are to reach them.

    The Law of Attraction and Intentions

    The Law of Attraction isn’t some one-size-fits-all solution. It’s not a magic wand you wave around to get what you want. It’s a belief that positive or negative thoughts can shape your life experiences. It’s about energy, vibes, and all that jazz. But here’s the kicker: it’s highly individualized. What works for one person might be a total flop for another. Why? Because we’re all unique, with different personalities and life experiences. Check out this new way to approach the Law of Attraction for a fresh perspective.

    Remember: what we focus on expands. So if we want more good shit to happen in our lives, we need to focus on setting intentions for what we want—and then let go and trust that the Universe will take care of the rest. Give it a shot today and see how setting intentions can help manifest your goals—and make every day a kickass day.

    Ready to dive deeper into self-discovery? Check out the ‘Unmask Your True Self’ guide for a comprehensive journey into self-discovery, supplemented with video training lessons, audio lessons mediations, and bonus courses that allow you to feel more connected and supported.

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